Tuesday, December 30, 2014

Looking Back and Moving Forward...

   I wanted to take a minute to look back at 2014 in order to look forward to 2015.  It was certainly a whirlwind of a year.  Finding out I was pregnant and going through a pregnancy that was pretty smooth up until about 33 weeks then being in and out of the hospital a few times was hard.  Then my sweet boy was born toward the end of October and life is definitely not the same.  Being a mom has been the hardest but most amazing thing I've ever done in my life. 

   2014 is ending with me being unemployed for the first time in about 7 years.  We are going to give this stay at home mom thing a trial run.  We have plans up in the air... waiting on God to give us direction and show us His plan.  I look so forward to seeing what 2015 will hold.  I know there will be extremely hard times (because that's life...) but I pray the good times far outweigh the bad.

   So I made a few goals for 2015.  Without goals, you work toward nothing.  And putting them in writing makes them real.  So here they are...

1) Pay off the car.
     ~I hate car payments.  As much as it would be nice to, I don't need to drive a new car.  As a matter
       of fact, our "newest" car will be 10 years old in 2015.  I would much rather be payment and debt
       free.  Although all the fun new features would be nice.  Maybe one day I can just pay cash for a
       newer car after all my debt is paid off. (hey... gotta stay positive, right?)

2) Lose 45 pounds (also read exercise and eat healthy again).
     ~This may take a while but ideally, I'd like this to happen by my birthday in April.

3) Run a 5k (or ambitiously a couple).
     ~I'd also like this to happen by my birthday.  I almost made it to one at the end of 2013 but then
       we moved and things got all flipped around.  I stopped running and exercising all together then
       got pregnant and used that as an excuse because I was so extremely tired most of the time.  But
       2015.... I have no excuses.

4) Make new friends.
      ~Perhaps this one sounds a little childish but for some reason I just crave the opportunity to meet
       new friends.  Making friends as an adult is difficult.  I'm hoping to find a few moms that have
       babies about the same age as Maddox to hang out with and hopefully their husbands are cool too.
       (again... staying positive loll)

5) Do one random act of kindness a month.
      ~Preferably do them anonymously but I know that's not always possible.  I'm going to have to
      get creative given that my new job status is going to make life very hard financially.

6) Have a couple family photo sessions done.
       ~This one will also be difficult to do financially but maybe I could get a part time job somewhere
       to help with any extra stuff.  Hard to find a part time job that isn't retail.  I really don't want to
       work on the weekend since that is special family time to me but if I have to, I have to.

7) Get back into photography.
       ~I've thrown around the idea of starting my photography business back but I'm not quite there
       100%.  I have a lot to think through when it comes to that.  So for now, I will say to get back into
       photography period and try new things... think outside of the box and out of my comfort zone. 
       Maybe do a couple online photography challenges through the year and a self-portrait project
       again.

8) Do monthly pictures with Maddox.
       ~I'm sure this just sounds like a given but I'm including it so I could make sure to do it.  Seeing
       how much he has changed already in just two months makes me want to keep up with
       everything.  Being a photographer, it's hard to get past only wanting to work with the best light
       and seeing all the negatives about pictures that I take but really I need to put my mommy goggles
       on and just go with it.  I look back at pictures of myself from when I was a kid and the quality of
       those really suck but I'm thankful to have the pictures anyway.

9) Start doing my quiet time again
      ~I've let myself get so slack with this.  When we lived in our apartment (last year), I would get up
      at 4:45am and go down to the gym and run (or wog lol), get ready for work, and have plenty of
      time to do my quiet time.  I felt better when I did that.  I need to do it again.  I also want to find a
      women's Bible study during the week (during the day where they also have childcare).

10) Be content where we are or find a house that fits within our budget.
      ~When I say the "within our budget" part, it means the budget that comes with me staying at
      home with Maddox and not relying on any money I may or may not bring in.  With that will come
      a lot of compromise and sacrifice but I think I'm there.  I've always had a champagne taste on a
      beer budget... like cheap beer lol.  But having Maddox and having the desire to stay home with
      him grow exponentially when he was born changes my mind on things.  If we could find a house
      that at least has good bones and we could potentially fix it up a bit to make it ours, I think that
      would be awesome.  I would love for this to happen this year but if not, I'm going back to the first
      part of the goal... just be content.  We are in a nice condo in a nice neighborhood.  I've always had
      a problem with just being still and being content.

So what are your goals for 2015?  What are you going to do your best to work toward?  Do you reward yourself when you reach those goals? If so, how?

Friday, December 26, 2014

Maddox (Two Months)

It's a little difficult to take 2 month old pictures when the baby has to get shots and then sleeps for the rest of the day and you don't want to disturb him for fear of what that could mean.  So this is a little late.

Two Month Appointment
Weight: 13lbs 14oz (95%) (giving mommy a workout...)
Height: 21.75in (25%)
Head: 40cm (50%) 
The doctor's comment when she walked in "omgoodness, look at all his chins" haha poor kid.

~First Smile: Dec. 12 (7 weeks). I was holding him and looking for something in his dresser and looked down at him and he was smiling at me.  Mommy heart explosion right there.
~First night sleeping in his crib: Dec. 12.  It went really well.
~We had Thanksgiving but didn't go to my family's gathering because we didn't want him around a lot of people.  Come to find out, there really wasn't many people there so we could have gone and been fine. So we went to Darren's parents and then that weekend we got together with my immediate family and aunt and uncle.  My nephew calls Maddox "Magdox". It's cute of course... kind of like when he called me "Ann Mi Sasa".
~I made Darren come to his 2 month appointment with me so he could hold Maddox when he got his shots.  I couldn't bring myself to do it.
~He has his first cold (Merry Christmas to us...)
~He's starting to coo and make fun little baby noises.
~I left my job and will be staying home with him for a little while (or a long while... we'll see).
~I call him Jack Jack sometimes... like the little baby on the incredibles.  When he gets really mad, his face gets BRIGHT red just like the little baby at the end just before his head busts into flames lol It's startling and funny at the same time.
~When he starts to wake up, he moves his head back and forth like Ray Charles.
~Visited Santa for the first time on December 8th.
~Guess I'll include his first Christmas on this post even though technically it happened a few days after Christmas.  Oh well.  Christmas Eve was hectic.  We always do Christmas with Darren's family on Christmas Eve morning so we didn't change that this year.  Maddox did well considering it was most of the day and he's used to chillin' at home.  He racked up on toys and clothes.  Then that evening, we had Christmas at my grandfather's with my mom's side of the family.  Maddox had a little bit of a meltdown but thanks to his aunt Jennifer, he passed out for most of the evening.  That night, it took him about an hour to go to sleep but the sweet little thing gave us 5 straight hours of sleep.  I woke up thinking something was wrong and I had missed something lol

As for me...
~Probably adding to those lingering 12 labs with the holidays but the first of the year, it's on baby... especially since I'm going to be at home for a while. Definitely nothing stopping me but myself.
~I'm without a job for the first time in a very long time.  This is new territory for me.  I'm going to need to make the most of it in case it doesn't last as long as I would like.


November 23, November 24, November 27

November 27 (both), November 29 (had to lol)

November 29, November 30, December 1

December 3, December 4, December 5

December 7, December 9, December 10
 
December 14, December 15 (both)

December 17, December 19 (both)

December 23, December 24 (both)
 
November 30 (I love my little family)

November 30 (so sweet)

November 30

7 weeks... Is he not the cutest thing you've ever seen?!
 



Can't believe how much he has grown.  My teeny tiny baby is now a chunky monkey.
 
 
Well...guess that's about it.  I really need to start writing things down but at this point, I'm not really sure what to document.  What do you keep up with for your little ones? Little things you want to remember?
 
~Ciao!
 

Tuesday, December 23, 2014

And just like that...

  I suppose you can disregard my last woe-is-me post from the other day.  I went back to work for one day and then made a very abrupt decision to stay at home for a while.  Not sure how long that will be.  We just know it was the right decision for our family.  Everything happens for a reason really.  God knows the big picture and He has always provided for us in the past and I have no doubt in my mind that He will continue to show Himself to us as long as we keep our focus on Him.  I don't know how people live without a relationship with Christ.  How can anyone get through the day without faith?  My heart hurts for them.

  Being the number cruncher I am (I get that from my dad), I'm sure I will write and rewrite every thing I can think of in every way possible in order to see a glimmer of hope that yes, we can do this.  I already called and cut off cable and just kept internet which saved quite a bit.  The only shows we watch are either on CBS.com or Netflix so that works for us.  We've been without cable for several days now and don't miss it at all.  Then because of a couple of mess ups from Verizon, we will now save $50 a month on that bill for a year.  Any little bit helps, right?

  The other day, I found myself sitting at a local coffee shop with my 8-week old baby in a carseat asleep beside me and one week before Christmas, feeling blessed and a burden lifted off of me.  I am grateful to get a little extra time with him.  I don't know how long that time will last... it could be a couple of weeks or it could be a lot longer (God willing) but I will appreciate every moment.  I have lots of thoughts and plans rolling through my head (when do I not?) but I'm going to take it slow and not rush into any decisions.

   I have to take a second and say that I truly have the best husband ever.  He's been the biggest supporter and I really don't know what I would do without him.  He works so hard to provide for our family... full time and part time a couple of nights but he's still willing to discuss the possibility of my staying at home with Maddox.  I consider that, in itself, gracious and selfless and I appreciate him so very much.

   I know my faith will be tested over the next period of time and things could get really hard (harder than they've already been) but I know I will look back over this time and see God's hand in it all.  And because of that, I will be a stronger person and I will be a living testimony of what can happen when you put your trust in Christ alone.

Tuesday, December 16, 2014

Woes of a Working Mom

  First of all, I'll start by saying that I am extremely grateful to have a job to help ends meet when so many others do not have this luxury.  However, it's SO hard to keep this perspective when looking down at my 8 week old baby knowing that I have to leave him and go back to work tomorrow.  It's rather gut wrenching.  Maybe some don't feel that way and crave adult interaction during the day... that's cool... but that's not me.  I know that staying home is just as exhausting because you're basically at the baby's beck and call but you get that time... that time that passes SO quickly and you can't ever get back.  Maybe it will get easier?
   I know it's not even remotely feasible for me to stay at home right now... trust me... no matter how many times I write the numbers, they don't change.  It's certainly not because we live some lavish lifestyle or drive new cars or have a big house.  Our debt is not made up of a lot of stuff.  We rent a 2 bedroom condo. We have a small car payment because my husband got a job (that we are very thankful for) 30 something miles away and it made sense for us to get a car that was good on gas rather than him drive his truck.  I had surgery to help me lose weight and give me a healthier life.  We were forced to pay the IRS a chunk of money with the sell of our house.  I have student loans (who doesn't?).  We now have a ton of medical bills from my high-risk pregnancy and Maddox's birth.  Darren even works a part time second job (from home a couple nights a week) to help make ends meet and I would desperately like to figure out a way that he could quit without putting us in a worse situation so we could enjoy those evenings as a family.
   I'm trying to tell myself to give it a year and then re-evaluate things.  In the grand scheme of things, one year is nothing.  But add a baby to that and I think about all the things I will miss out on.  We are very thankful that Darren's mom is keeping Maddox and for the amount we would pay a very inexpensive daycare (do those even exist??).  But the selfish mommy side of me says no one but myself is good enough to take care of him and it's not fair that I don't get to spend those extra 8 hours a day with him. I try to remind myself that I get every evening, every overnight feeding, every weekend, etc.... but gosh... it sure doesn't make it any easier.  It also makes me feel extremely guilty to consider adding any time for just me in there.  Like moms don't feel 100% more guilty for things after having a child already.  I know I do it to myself but I'm not sure how to deal with it all.  Darren jokes and says "maybe you need to go talk to somebody".  Well this is my form of doing that... regardless if anyone responds.
   On top of not wanting to go back to work is the dilemma of how does one juggle everything else in life?  How am I supposed to work 8 hours, spend quality time with my husband and son, keep the house clean, laundry done, eat healthy, exercise (what?!), and maybe get a decent night sleep before waking up to do it all over again?  I've read articles and blogs and forum posts about other mothers returning to work and this is the kind of stuff I found... "You get creative with your time"... what does that even mean? I don't have the energy to get creative.  "You set your priorities"... that's all you've got for me?  I suppose if I had done that many years ago, I may not be in this mess now.  "You play the hand you've been dealt"... so basically that just says you deal with it and move on.  "You make sacrifices"... yeh, no kidding.  Ugh.
   I feel pretty certain that I will need to stay away from Facebook starting tomorrow.  Maybe now will be a good time to just go ahead and take a little break from the social media world.  I would say a good 90-95% of my friends are stay at home moms.  I really need to build some new friendships with people who work outside of their home and have positive attitudes about it.  Those people exist right?  And how do I add that to my ever growing list of things to do? lol
  So here's to a good vent session and encouragement to make a long goal list for 2015.  If I figure out how to turn working into a positive thing... I'll pass along the info.  Until then, I will just continue to pray that God shows me the silver lining to it all.

Ciao!

Friday, December 12, 2014

Maddox (One Month)

   I told myself I was going to write down (or blog) things monthly that I want to remember (mostly about Maddox) but I haven't gotten there yet.  I wrote 2 posts about life in general and never posted them and now they don't even make sense to post lol Hate it when that happens!  So here is my attempt at trying to remember things in the first month (now that he's 7 weeks)...

First Month Appointment
Weight: 9lbs 15oz (75%) (gained 4lbs in a month....I cry if I do that lol although I really think those 4lbs came in a week... not a month... crazy)
Height: 20in (5%)
Head: 13in (50%) (I think that's what it was anyway... yikes)
Healthy baby.  Kid likes to eat.

~He likes to sleep propped up on the boppy
~He's hot natured but seems to sleep best when he's really warm (but then he wakes up all clammy so we are afraid of over-heating him)
~He does this thing when he wakes up where his arms go beside his head and he arches his back and moves his head back and forth with his lips puckered out as he stretches.
~I think he stayed curled up so much in the womb that he continued to keep his legs pulled up to him for several weeks.  Makes changing a diaper difficult.
~Speaking of diaper changes.... not a fan.
~He got diaper rash at about 3 weeks old or so and I'm not sure who it hurt worse to change him, us or him.  We could tell it hurt so bad by the way he cried.  We had to try to remind ourselves that it wasn't our fault. I know it won't be the last time but man.... diaper rash is straight from hell.
~Sleeps in the rock n'sleep beside me in our room.
~Naps on the couch in his boppy or on his belly (supervised of course).
~Has some tummy issues that cause inconsolable crying sometimes which is hard on all of us.
~Sleeps like daddy with his hands up beside his head.
~Sleeping for about 2-3 hours at night.
~Eats 2-3 ounces every 2-3 hours.
~Lets you know quickly if he is hungry or has a dirty diaper.
~Our first trip out together (the two of us that is) was to Walmart at 3 weeks old.  I felt very successful that day...I showered and everything lol
~Our first trip out as a family was to Concord Mills at 2.5 weeks.  We probably shouldn't have done it but I had cabin fever and Darren needed something for his rifle before hunting season started.  Of course we didn't realize there was a race of some sort that day so the mall was CRAZY!  Oh well... we survived.
~Gammy (my mom) and Nana (Darren's mom) have both come over several times so I could run errands or go to the doctor. A little "me" time was greatly appreciated.
~Darren and I had a nice date night out for his birthday at the Cajun Queen.

A couple things I've learned...
~I have to recognize my emotions while I'm holding him because he feeds off of them.  So if I'm getting frustrated from not being able to calm him, I have to get that in check and make my body chill out.  Weird how you can even do that.
~Speaking of emotions... When people talk about hormones and you've never experienced it, holy moly! I cried more in the first month than I have probably cried in 5 years combined.  Seriously.  I'm not really an emotional person (ok I WASN'T an emotional person lol) but pretty much anything would set it off.  I could be watching a movie and be it sad or sweet, here come the tears.  Or just looking at Maddox while he was sleeping and thinking that he wouldn't be that little for long.  I really couldn't even hum a whole song while rocking him without crying.  That's getting a little better but man... I still have a long way to go.
~I've become a somewhat light sleeper.
~Baby weight... still have about 12lbs hanging around but I'm surprisingly ok with it for now.
~One day at a time...don't wish it away by thinking "I can't wait until he does this or that".
~Mommy brain is a FOR REAL thing!

Warning...Picture over-load ;) 
   I'm really not sure what I would have done without an iphone.  Those first few weeks, who in the world wants to take the time to take REAL pictures and have to edit them?!

October 22, October 24, October 25

October 27 (both), October 29 (1 week)

October 30 (both), October 31

November 1, November 3, November 5 (2 weeks)

November 5, November 11, November 12

November 14 (both), November 17

November 17, November 18, November 19 (3 weeks)

Here are a few one month old pictures that I played around with :)





 
 
Stay tuned for his 2 month post very soon since this one was so late!

Wednesday, December 3, 2014

Maddox- Birth Story

   This is going to be super wordy (and some couple possibly consider it tmi) but I'm writing it for myself more than anything so if you want to read it, cool... if not... that's cool too :)

     When I was 37 weeks, Maddox was still transverse in my belly until that Thursday when I had an ultrasound and it showed that he had turned head down.  I had been scheduled to go in the following Monday for a c-section but since he turned, they changed it to an induction.  So I went in Monday evening to get started with the induction process.  Which by the way, NO one told me what that process even involved.  You’d think they could at least walk you through what they are going to do.  My sister in law emailed me the process she went through but that’s all I knew of it.  Anyway…. the maternity ward was SUPER busy so we spent the night in the observation room.  Several times we heard someone screaming…. so that was fun.  Nothing like hearing someone scream in pain to make you look forward to what is to come.  Tuesday morning, we were moved into a labor and delivery room and I got started on Pitocin.  They cranked it up through the day to the highest dose and that evening, they went ahead and broke my water.  I was only 2.5ish cm at that time and they thought it was worth trying to get things going.  Contractions got quite uncomfortable but when they told me I was only 3cm, I opted for just some "regular" pain meds rather than an epidural.  The pain meds (as do most) knocked me out.  They also caused Maddox’s heartrate to drop.  They came in the room and stopped the Pitocin and had me move to my side which hurt extremely bad.  Then moved me to my other side which hurt just as bad.  I had still made no further progress.  So they stopped everything for the night.  The next morning, they gave me the choice to either start the Pitocin back or to go ahead and schedule a c-section for that morning.  I kind of already knew that I’d probably end up with a c-section regardless so I opted to go ahead and schedule it rather than to put myself in an emergency situation.  Also since they had already broken my water, I only had until 6pm that evening to have him before they would take him anyway because of the risk of infection.  I really wished I had just stuck with the original plan of having the c-section on Monday.


    So I walked back to the OR.  I think the thing I feared the most was the spinal block.  It was difficult getting that because they want you to tell them if what you are feeling is more to the left or the right or the middle while you’re sitting there freezing and scared out of your mind.  He had to do mine twice.  Then they laid me down and did some testing to make sure I was really numb like I was supposed to be.  They started it by using this cold cloth and saying “is it colder here or here?” kind of like at the eye doctor when they say “is this more clear or is this one?” when really they look the same.  But considering what they were about to do to me, I didn't feel bad telling him I couldn't tell.  Then the doctor pinched me a few times and I told them that it felt like I was being pinched.  The anesthesiologist was like “the doctor is squeezing your skin with metal tweezers, if you felt what she was really doing, you’d be coming out of your skin…I think you’re good” hah.  How was I supposed to know?  The nurse anesthetist was really nice and I told her I just needed her to keep having a conversation with me so I wouldn’t think about everything they were doing and I could get through the intense pressure and pulling they were doing.  No one can really describe to you how it feels to have a c-section.  Once they made sure I was nice and numb, they brought Darren in the room.  I know he was a nervous wreck but he hid it well as he always does.

    They pushed and pulled and felt like they were rearranging my insides and then I heard Maddox cry and they said "here’s your baby" and held him over the curtain.  It was pretty intense.  The emotions are kinda crazy.  Then they gave me morphine as they were putting me back together.  By that time, I could focus on what they were doing with Maddox and they bundled him up and handed him to Darren so he could bring him over to me.  He was so tiny.  5lb 15oz and 19.25in long.  It seemed like it took forever but it really was all super fast.  It was all still so surreal that we now had a baby and he was all ours.

 

     I was wheeled into recovery where I should have only stayed for an hour or so before I was taken to my room but my blood pressure was crazy high so I ended up staying there for a good 4 or 5 hours to get it under control.  They said they could give me stronger meds faster if I stayed there.  I didn’t argue obviously.  I was basically at stroke level (up to 220/120).  Stroke level high blood pressure and then they hand you your itty bitty baby.  Not sure if that’s the best solution when you don’t know what you’re doing.  Plus they were giving me pain meds too and I’m super sensitive to pain meds.  They put me in a different world.  Darren was there with me but left a couple of times, one to go talk to everyone in the waiting room and then to go with Maddox to the nursery where they gave him a shot and warmed him up a little to bring his temp up.
 
    Also, starting in the OR and continuing for hours afterward, they have to “rub your belly” which really means they are going to dig into your stomach to get your uterus to shrink down to avoid hemorrhaging.  That was the most horrible feeling.  It hurt worse than any contractions or the whole c-section itself.  They continue to do it in recovery every 15 minutes or so and then every hour and then every couple of hours.  It’s basically a form of torture in my book.  I mean… I understand it’s necessary but wow.
  
      Due to my blood pressure, I had to do my recovery in the high risk area (hello medical bills!).  There, we had my nurse, a tech, Maddox’s nurse, and visits from my doctors and his.  So we got lots of rest… yeh right!  They had me on percocet for most of the time I was there until I realized that it would cause me to involuntarily shake at random times.  It was kind of weird.  So I asked to be put on something different.  They then put me on hydrocodone.  Hydrocodone puts me into a different world (hence the drugged look in the picture above loll).  Definitely not something I should be on and be responsible for caring for a newborn.  They sent me home with a prescription of it and after the first night, Darren kindly asked me if there was any way I could do without it.  So I stopped taking that and just relied on Tylonel for pain.
 
   
   A few days after we were home I started noticing that my incision was really uneven and more painful on my left side.  Given that I’ve never had a c-section, I figured maybe I was just going through the healing process.  I decided to go ahead and see the doctor anyway.  The doctor thought maybe I had a hematoma but they did some stuff to it where they sprayed this really cold saline stuff into it.  Nothing bad came out so they didn’t run a culture.  I went home  thinking that maybe it was just something that would take some time to go away and had an antibiotic to take “just in case”.  I then started having really bad pains on my right side and went back that same week.  It’s always encouraging when your doctor doesn’t know what is causing the pain and “maybe it’s connected to the infection on the left side”.  The doctor went  ahead and did the saline thing again and that time, it was infected so they ran a culture.  They wanted to set me up to get a wound vac but they couldn’t find a company that was able to do it so they  told me to go to the ER the next morning and get  it packed.  We went to the ER the next morning and thankfully we were there less than an hour.  They showed Darren how to pack the wound which I’m really glad I didn’t have to see.  Knowing what they were doing with the stringy stuff was enough to make me queasy if I thought about it.  It’s not so much the packing part that gets to me...it’s the pulling the stuff out that grosses me out.  Thankfully Darren is intrigued by medical stuff and he’s a really great nurse.  So for over a week, he changed my gauze twice a day and my packing every couple of days.  I told him he should have been a nurse.  Oh...so I had been on the antibiotic for like 4 days or so (4x a day) and I got a call that my infection was actually resistant to the antibiotic i was taking so I had to start over with a new one.  Fun times.
   
    One big thing that I want to remember for the next baby (if there is one) is that I need to write down things that I want other people to remember to do for me because I will be too caught up (or drugged).  For example, other than the pics that my mom took with her phone (the ones above and maybe a couple more) and just a couple in the OR, we have no pics from the hospital because I was completely out of it.  So next time... we have to remember to do that!  The only pics we have of Maddox in the hospital is the first one Darren took in the OR and then the one I took of him in his going home outfit.  That's it :(. Can't go back now...

   Oh yeh... one thing no one bothers telling a first time mom is that C-section babies tend to still have amniotic fluid in their lungs (I'm sure other babies probably to but more so C-section babies because they are squeezed when coming out) so it's possible that in the middle of the night (or whenever), in your drugged state, you could be awakened by strange noises and something hitting you (oh yes, it came out with a force evidently) and you realize that your baby in the box beside you has stuff coming out of his mouth and nose. WHAT IN THE WORLD IS HAPPENING?! lol Of course this happened to me and I sat straight up using my freshly cut ab muscles (ouch!) and yelled for Darren to call the nurse.  I mean seriously...they could have warned me or something.  That's one of the scariest things... The nurse (who obviously has to stay calm about stuff) came in and just acted like it was no big deal and suctioned his mouth and nose.  Sheesh...

    So in a nutshell, that's my story and I'm sticking to it.  I'm probably leaving something out but I think I did pretty good to remember that considering they were giving me good drugs around the clock lol.
 
   To all my friends who texted me for updates...thank you. And sorry for not writing you back much at all.  They put my iv in my right hand and if you've ever tried to text with either an iv in your dominant hand or with your non-dominant hand, you know it's a pain and you'd just rather not :)  Feel free to text me now! lol