Saturday, June 15, 2013

Changing Perspective

First of all, I'm watching Pride and Prejudice for the second time this weekend  lol  I love the version with Keira Knightley and Matthew MacFadyen.  I don't usually like movies that are set in this time period for some reason but there's something about this particular movie that I just love.  I should probably read the book.

Thursday, I did an owner inspection of our house with my property manager.  Darren wasn't able to make it and that was probably best anyway.  It was very awkward.  The renters refused to leave in order for us to see it in private which I found very rude.  So we had to walk around the house with them kind of following us around.  Honestly, if I had met these people when they first wanted to rent the house....I wouldn't have agreed to it.  I also wasn't happy about the condition of the house.  There is no way that we will be able to put the house on the market with them living in it.  There was stuff EVERYWHERE! and their dog had chewed at some dry rot that was beginning to appear on the door frame leading out to the back porch so the  backdoor will need to be replaced.  The door in the master bedroom will also need to be replaced.  I came home from the inspection and just sat down and cried.  The people who can't afford their rent have a suburban sitting in the garage that I'm sure is newer than even my own car plus another older suburban sitting out front.  Please explain to me why you would buy the biggest gas guzzler you can find when you CAN'T AFFORD YOUR RENT!  It's just beyond me.  So once I had finished crying, I wrote my property manager and explained to her that I was not happy about the house and I'd like to go ahead and give them 30 days notice to get out.

Yesterday, I had an appointment with my counselor.  We talked a lot about the stress that I'm under with the house situation and our finances.  She told me that I needed to change my perspective and change what I'm praying for.  I've been very selfish in my prayers about this whole thing.  I've been praying for God to sell our house quickly once we are able to get it on the market because I feel like that is what would be best for us and it would take a lot of stress off of me.  She suggested that I think of it differently.  That I need to pray for God to work in the situation that will in turn bring him the most glory.  I need to give the house to him and show us how he can use it.  Whether that be renting it again or to sell it.  Either way, to help us prepare for the family that will move into it.  And while we are fixing it up, do it as a service to God.  So while we are replacing the doors or painting the walls, instead of harboring ill feelings towards the people that left it that way, think of it as a service.  I'm hoping by doing this, i truly can give all of this to God and stop taking it back only to stress about it.  I know He's got this and I don't have anything to worry about.  I don't know why I torture myself with this stuff.

Tomorrow, I leave for Panama City Beach.  I'm thankful for the opportunity to get out of the office and get paid for it.  I know I'll probably get home sick.  Darren isn't able to go and it's been a long time since we've been apart for so long.  But at least I know I will be very occupied.  I always get anxious when it comes to doing stuff like this because I feel like I have to be doing something all the time.  But I'm only going to take pictures and surely no one expects me to take pictures 24/7.  I was already told to bring my A game for volleyball so I am looking forward to that.  It's an everyday thing down there.  So at least I'll be getting my exercise.  Then there's the beach.  It'll be nice to go out on the beach and do my quiet time.  

As soon as I get back on Friday, we'll be heading to the beach for a family reunion.  I'm not looking forward to the family reunion itself but I'm looking forward to being able to spend some time with my family on the beach and at the pool.  Hopefully I can relax and get some great pictures.

I have my 3 month follow-up visit at my surgeon's office next Monday.  I won't be able to weigh for a whole week before that  lol yikes!  But I've already acheived the goal that they gave me for my visit so that's good. I'm down 55lbs total.  I'm hoping to be down 60 by then with all the sweating i'll be doing and the volleyball and walks on the beach and playing in the pool.  surely :)  I'll have to take a lot of protein shakes and bars with me so I'm not tempted to eat some of the things that the kids will be eating.

Ok.  That's all I've got. :)  "You have bewitched me body and soul"

1 comment:

  1. Sorry about the house. I LOVE what your counselor said...amazing. That is such a great way to work through the stress surrounding your house. I like the acronym I made up of GITG, Give It To God. So much peace in that. Have fun on your trip and congrats on -55lbs! Woo hoo!